Bag... Rambling...

Okay, after looking for SO SO long, if you didnt buy anything, that sales woman will be really upset.

Decide soon, Are you buying this bag because it looks good or because its a Gucci?

Gucci!!

Alright then buy the cheaper one, it still looks glam and you will look chic for sure, and not like the older people who carry the dull classic one.

Just gave my card. Oh my God, why am i feeling so scared buying this bag. Is it okay to spend so much on a bag?

DONE - Final sales, cannot be returned
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Aiyo, i could have donated this money, and probaly would have covered the cost of eductation of a kid back in India.

Its okay Madhu, back in India you might have bought something in Gold. Its just an accessory. Chill madhu.

Even that cook from the famous Spicy Burger place near Office bought 2 Gucci bags just in front of you. Its just okay.
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Rewind

I have been thinking of buying a Gucci/Louis Vuitton/Prada or Burberry bag for few months now.

Few months back when i was not able to convince myself to buy one of the above mentioned, and i ended up buying a funky BCBGMaxAzaria bag. It is cute, flashy, trendy but could be carried only with a completely black or white dress. I love the bag.

Last few weeks, i have been spending time with Shu trying to figure out which bag i should be buying. Most Gucci's seemed boring, Burberry for someone who is old. Louis vuiton's Monogram Vernis seemed the best. I just love the patent leather in Louis Vuitton. All Prada bags which were 1500 bucks looked awesome. I just love the soft leather.

I realised i am scared of snake leather and crocodile leather. i dropped a Jimmy Choo bag when i came to know that i was holding snake skin.

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I am trying to understand if these bags really have something different from other cheaper brands. They definitely look more classy, more elegant. They somehow standout without shouting too much.

And somehow will give me more confidence when i walk into Bavern from now on.

I think it works

Thanksgiving Dinner

So i had promised myself that i will blog about my experience hosting the Thanksgiving dinner.

Around 12 hours of continuous and passionate cooking - 4 hours on Wednesday night and around 8 hours on Thursday. Loved it. Enjoyed every moment of it. The final menu had around 5 appetizers, 6 entrees and 3 desserts. Hosting people for another 5 hours. Hmm..Awesome and Tiring :).

I think i just am overrating myself, lots of people do this all the time specially our moms and don't brag about it so much. I think i am bragging since i choose to do this , when i don't need to :).

But all this is "Me" - both the passion and bragging... lol...
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This time hosting the dinner was way less stressful than before. I guess this time, i planned some things ahead of time. I was amazed much one could achieve if one planned even a little bit, i only wish we could do this for life. Life seems so much more complicated, but i guess some amount of planning helps.
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Some learning's about me

1. I love cooking

2. I am there... i am just going to get it.. hmm.. not there yet.

Somewhere in me, i am trying to touch my roots. I want to belong to what i grew up with. I want to eat the food my mom cooked. I want to celebrate the festivals she did. I want to share this with my mom and my sister.

2. Perfectionist

I have an insatiate desire to keep doing things to some stage of perfection(which is just sky high and undefined which makes it less measurable). I want perfection in everything in life. I end up doing much more that i can physically/emotionally/mentally handle. There are a lot of people who would be completely satisfied with half of what i do. I am never satisfied. Need to figure out how to fix this or even know whether i need to fix this.

Sometimes.. no I always wonder why i even think of fixing this drive. Why should i not aim for stars? I guess I am scared of the disappointments ... Okay Madhu ... No more pessimism . Whats the worst that can happen.. You will have a new perspective in my life and another experience that will enrich you as a person.
My feet and hands are still aching(just booked a massage to fix these... lol)

2. Options, More Options. So that if one dish does not click the other one will. Failures scare me. Madhu at least protect yourself in cooking.

3. No Madhu, one dish is not enough, oh he does not like it.. Oh i "didnt" forget that she does not eat this.

Be forgetful once in a while

I think my Mom gave me this, who used to cook different things for my dad, my sister and me.

5. Don't plan so much. Just write down everything and finish the damn grocery shopping. Learn to make decisions at the right point of time.
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Mujhe Chaand Chahiye ...

Thanksgiving morning

@930 am - need to clean up my place. Let me atleast start doing the laundry.

I am glad i have a delay in my dish washer, even before i woke up it started cleaning all the dishes. I have few more dishes to go, but defintely much lesser effort.

I am thinking if i should use the orange/yellow paper plates and cutlery i bought yesterday at the last moment from Everything party, or i should just stick on to the "Ever in my house" Square corelle plates for dinner.

@10 am - Just found an awesome Dhall recipe from the "Taste of Nepal" book, and started cooking it. Dhalls are the most simple things. Dont have to do much there, dont need to keep standing.

Also i made my signature Eliachi Chai, and typing this post as i am drinking the tea.

What did i do yesterday night?

1. Made choclate Mousse - just love Julia childs recipes - though i screwed up at the end by adding a bit of rum :(
2. Made Raita
3. Panner Butter Masala without onions and Garlic(and with lots of honey and cashews)
4. Marinated chicken for shawarma


So whats up for today after this?

1. Chicken Curry
2. Some Veg fry - thinking if i should make mixed veg fry or beans fry
3. Chicken Shawarma
4. Potatos.
5. Might bake the almond cookie bars(but lets see).

This time... i am trying to make my cooking/dinner inviting experience less stressful. I am cooking one dish at a time, so that i enjoy cooking the dish. And having a fun time... Read trying to hide the anxious me ...

Pre Thanksgiving

Finally after 2 years of being in the US, i am going to host a thanksgiving dinner. I thought this time ill be efficent in my planning and cooking, but seems like nothing has fallen in place. The only thing that i did right was sending out the invitations. There is still deocration, plates and music and cooking left. Pretty much everything left

The menu for tommorrow seems interesting

Apetizers
1. Crumbled Potato fries
2. Bhel Puri
3. Samosas(not sure yet)

Main Course
1. Peas Rice
2. Rotis/Parathas
3. Pepper Chicken curry
4. Chicken Shawarma
5. Panner Curry
6. Beans fry
7. Dhall
8. Moor kolumbu
9. Mashed Potatoes

Dessert
1. Almond roca cookie bars
2. Rasmalai
3. Chocolate Mousse
4. Ice Creams
5. Probably Creme Brulee

Need to stock everything up, and start cooking tonight.

Just met my Physiotherapist who suggested me the exercises so that i dont get tired cooking.

Happy cooking to me :)

Early mornings ... Painting...

After a long time, i woke up at 8ish. Just feels so good when you wakeup early in the morning. You steal few minutes from your busy monotonous life - some time just for you, some time when you can relax. The day also seems to be so long. You realise the day has so much potential.

My new found interest is painting, and i am amazed how different my paintings look when i paint in the class. I realised, its also because of the perspective my teacher, Virginia gives me. How she abstracts out what should be in a picture. She always tells - when you have a photo- you should find out what you like the most from the picture and just take that to your painting. You dont have to make a detailed painting, just paint what you like.. what you want to highlight...

Sorry for the bad picture quality.. I promise, ill charge my camera and post better pictures soon.

Rasgollas

There are somethings that remind you of home... One thing is the sweets that my mom used to make. Rasgolla was the only sweet i used to eat as a kid - i never liked gulab jamuns. i think i somehow knew that the effort put in to make gulab jamuns was much lesser.

More i feel homesick, more is the urge to recreate home. I cant get the environment here sitting in the US, but atleast i can cook something that reminds me of home.

We dont get the authetic rasgollas here, for that matter any sweets we get are horrible. I have been wanting to make rasgollas for a while. I had thought ill make them in the weekend, but as all of you know something or the other comes up.

Finally i decided to make them yesterday. I guess i would have called my mom 4-5 times to ask her what i should be doing. At each and evey step of making. My mom seemed to share the excitement i had.

She and I were so happy that the Rasgollas didnt spilt - this is the problem which most people have when making them.... she was just so happy that i was able to make them.

Man, after cooling them they taste "OK" according to me. They taste like the "worst" rasgollas my mom would have made but they still taste like something my mom made. They are round and remind me of home! As of now thats all matters to me ...

Demistyfying opening a medicine bottle...

For long i never knew how to open these bottles which are marked -"Press down and open". I either thought i didn't have the strength to keep holding it down or someone would help me doing it... I always thought it was something beyond me ...

Finally i opened one such bottle :). Everything in life is similar - unless you do it, you don't realise you are capable of it... Do things.. and never be scared of anything...

luv life...

Teacher's Day

Lots of fond memories associated with the teachers day. Back in school, this was a huge event. I always liked a subject only if i liked the teacher. I don't know why, but i always needed that motivation.

Every year during teachers day, i had this hard task of deciding which teachers i would give flowers to. Just like today, i would always be confused. I always knew the teachers i liked, but i would also not want to make any other teacher feel bad rather annoy them.

Some more things with my teachers day - 10th std, that was the first time i wore a Saree - a Pink colored cotton saree. I also took classes - 2nd and 3rd standard. I have always been very thorough in my preparations. So i spent days in deciding what i would teach them. It was one of the best experiences in my life.. the 2nd standard kids didn't know that i was not a teacher.. it was fun :)

Teachers day in my 12th std was scary - all these guys, who supposedly had a crush on me came to the class i was teaching... hmm.. fun it was.. how not to laugh, smile and take the class as if nothing is happening

I would love to mention Parvathi ma'am here - she is one person who believed in me and helped me realise my potential. Love u ma'am

London express

Looking forward to a really busy weekend. Its been long since i have been involved in something of this sort.. Enjoying every bit of the play.. Though i might just be playing a small role in the entire thing( not acting of course).. feels great to be part of it...

Shameless publicity again

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Guk-L0tW9k&fmt=18

Me Apni Favorite hoon

Its so easy to make this statement. what does it mean to be apni favorite. Is it doing what u want always? isnt that selfishness?

We always do what we want - what we desire to have is not the same as what we want .... what we want is determined by the numerous priority lists that we have... but when will what we desire for and what we want meet?

Tanhayee..

Kavitha loved being with people.. She was scared being left alone. She always did things to make people around her happy.

It was her 11th birthday. When she reached out to keep her bag in that old bench- she saw a gift and a card. She opened the card
A big red heart with "I love you" written in golden ink popped up. No one had signed the card. She loved the fact that someone was interested in her and was going through all this pain to get the card and gift. She knew that it was from Sudhir. She wondered how Sudhir would have saved so much money to buy the card and the gift. As usual Charu sat next to her. She told her it was from Sudhir. The guys in the class had been talking about it. She didn't know what to do. She knew lots of people were looking at her. She just tore the card and left the gift untouched. She wondered if she should have even opened the card. Did that make her look like she loved Sudhir?

Though she had matured a few months back , she was a kid in an adults body. She was really confused and her confusion showed. Sudhir followed her from school to home, from her tuition's to home. She really thought that Sudhir loved her - otherwise who would waste so much time? Sometimes when she came home late, she would be really scared. She wanted to tell all this to her parents, but was scared that mom would beat her. Mom would stop all her classes.

Since this was in 1990's people were really shocked that a kid could think about anything other than her Math/Science homework. Abisthu abishthu. Though she didn't go anywhere close to being in a relationship with the guy, suddenly the entire world was gossiping about her - her teachers, students around her. People called her immoral.

Chetna stood first in her class and Kavitha third. They hated each other and always tried to group against each other. This seemed a great opportunity for Chetna to mock Kavitha. It was the first day of school and everyone was trying to get a place. Radha and Kavitha fought for the second bench. Kavitha loved second bench- first bench needed too much attention and in any of the other benches she could not listen to the teacher well. As usual, all the girls came together and try to resolve the fight. Suddenly Chetna seemed to assume to role of the Judge - she said why should we believe you - You are a characterless girl. Kavitha was in tears. She decided to sit in the fourth bench. She was stuck there for a year.

Suddenly girls stopped talking to her. No one was ready to go to school with her. Most days she would cycle all alone to school with tears in her eyes looking at that beautiful bridge and the trees across the water.

Kavitha cried at home against that yellow wall for many nights . Even her parents didn't trust her.

Offlate she was not doing good in Maths. She decided to start attending some tutions. Ruchi Mam was cute. She said her satisfaction comes from helping people pass - not making people get centums. Kavitha just loved her teaching style. She started getting better and better in Maths, but her sadness and tension was always visible. One day Ruchi called her -It was the tenth test she had written in the tution and had got the tenth consecutive centum. Ruchi told her that its difficult to change perceptions, but not impossible. Believe in yourself and Work hard. The entire world will be behind you.

From that day onwards Kavitha became extremely focused on Math. She was the best student in Maths now. Everyone wanted her homework book, to copy answers now even Radha.

She was very lonely, she longed for company. The only way that seemed to be working was getting good marks. She worked hard and she was the topper of the class finally after 10 long years. Suddenly the entire world started considering her to be a role model. The person everyone wanted to be...

Life kept moving.. When she was 25, she got married to Ram. Her parents found Ram after extensive matching of horoscopes. They liked each other, both of them worked in Bangalore and so everyone felt it was a perfect match. They got engaged in Feb and got married in May. This time again she made her parents happy ...

High Heel Confidential

This is one site i am religiously following off late

http://www.highheelconfidential.com/

Now your question will be why this of all the other fashion sites? That's because this site concentrates on Indian stars and what they wear... I love the movies in Hollywood ... Par Phir bhi dhil hai hindustani ...

i didn't know even desi stars were so brand conscious. Also helps me figure out what goes good with the Indian skin tone...

Unaccustomed Earth ...

Human nature will not flourish, any more than a potato, if it be planted and replanted, for too long a series of generations, in the same worn-out soil. My children have had other birthplaces, and , so far as their fortunes may be within my control, shall strike their roots into unaccustomed earth.

- NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE

New Hairstyle ...

As one of my friends mentioned to me - "When you can't change anything else in your life - change your hairstyle"

Interesting times...

There is this phrase "Interesting times" that i have started using very frequently. Truly this year is going to be very interesting for me and lots of people around me - Postponement of my wedding to the uncertainty of the job, few of my close friends being laid off, weddings, divorces... sure .. it is interesting.

All these years - i kept thinking nothing can stop me aka i am all set to do what ever i want in my life. But wait - life is not a fairy tale..

This global meltdown is definitely testing my patience and confidence...

There is a very first time for everything in life.. For the first time, i felt nothing was falling in place no matter how hard i try- should i be patient? Actually do i really need to be patient?

For the first time i feel so insignificant ...Working offlate seems to be for only buying scarfs and sweaters... hmm.. never wanted that feeling to creep in me .. but what to do.. everything has a first time ...

Lets see how long i can stand this ...

Wait Wait - even in a fairy tale - the princess goes through tough times and finally meets her prince charming and lives happily ever after ...

First day first show

Yesterday was my first day at work this year. I tried implementing my old scheduling algorithm to my day. When i was a kid, i used to schedule every hour of the day, i knew what i wanted to do by end of day at least...

Today i was able to do things at 50% efficiency.. or may i say 50% of what i expect myself to do :)

I did quite a lot of things today - went to work by 1030ish.. great achievement considering the fact that i was getting to work only at 1115 am for last few weeks. I did a decent job at work - read few documents, attended a meeting where i learnt a few new things. I caught up with few old friends on messenger. I wanted to buy a rug - went to the shop to decide stuff.. I even went to my favorite craft store and bought the colors i needed for my new painting. After that i hit the gym as well... and mostly i am gonna paint now...

Looking forward to increase my efficiency and have more such days this year